Okay today i decide to delve into the little misconception i have witnessed many bear.
Many people think that marriage or a serious relationship is very complicated and difficult to sustain etc. However, in friendship is actually the most complicated, unexpectable and sophisticated form of relationship someone can land hiim/her self in.
I say so because, in a marriage, the duo are probably more familiar with one another, and thus the behaviour of the spouse is probably more expected. Also, if there is a change in the way the spouse behaves, the husband/wife will most likely learn to accept the change and adapt to the change as well. This is because of the love and strong bond that unconditionally unites these couple together.
However, in a friendship, the people involved are more likely to be antagonised by a change in their friends. They rarely try to consider the situation that friend is in, and rarely give them time to recuperate, and instead form many unfair judgements that put the friendship at stake. Many times, we may tell our friend off in a fit of confusion, shock and disbelief. If that friend is a very direct person, he/she might further aggravate the situation with a defensive approach and both parties will feel insulted. However if the friend is a more docile person, he/she might be extremely hurt by the comment and might slowly move away from us. In either of the cases the friendship is soon or later strained.
In many cases such strains may occur because someone doesnt cherish the other as much as the other cherishes him/her. This may be due to racial/gender differences. In these cases the person is looked at for what he is OUTSIDE and not for how he behaves etc.
Many people especially females also come under a misconception that being a "lookist" suggests that the boy treats a girl based on how pretty she is. However, this is not fully true. A lookist also includes someone who does not talk to another person, or treats him/her differently because him/she is of a different race, when the difference can be seen physically.
Another reason that strains friendship is EXPECTATION. For example, girls expect boys to be gentlemenly, and to treat them nicely. However, many use this to their advantage, and the unfair statement that goes something like "i am a girl u cannot hit me" comes along. This creates a very unfair as it creates a false impression that males cannot hurt females because, they are females. However, the real reason behind this, is, the men should on their own accord refrain from hurting a female because females are often physically weaker than males. Many girls EXPECT a guy to be gentlemenly, and thus subconsciously push their freedon to the limit. They do this by irritating and provoking the male to enjoy the sight when he does not retaliate, as they want to feel superior. In the animal kingdom this is also true. many cats like to lie down and smirk at leashed dogs to tell the dogs they are more superior in the present circumstances. However, the male often retaliates and the females deem him ungentlemenly. However, this is rather untrue. The male does this to show the female she is not to control and dominate him. When offense meets offense, it is always unfair to judge a person. However if the male hurts a female with no such reason, he may be labelled as ungentlemenly.
A quote:
"True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost."
With humble words I urge all who are guilty of misusing their friends, to treat them as humans, and to judge them for what they do, and how they make up for what they do
